With that said, I'm going to take the plunge and talk about "Aunt Flo's" monthly visit. I know that every.single.mother of a daughter with special needs freaks out about this concept WAY before the event actually happens. We imagine the worst! I know that I did.
We had one horrific week of Molly smearing poop ALL over all her bedsheets, walls, chairs, and herself DAILY when I'd put her down for her afternoon nap at 3-4 years old. I need to dig up the video footage of her room as it was disgusting and I was ready to call it quits on motherhood!!
So I was picturing her period being very similar to that. One week a month for the rest of her life.....
She was in 6th grade when I got a call from her school towards the end of the day. "Molly was having a really hard time and was pitching a fit in the bathroom. When she finally came out, I asked her what was wrong and to tell me on her talker". She pushed the button "Red". Aunt Flo had arrived and Molly's intuitive teacher knew exactly what she was talking about. Molly was coming home shortly thereafter so I was prepared. I went out to greet the bus like always, and as she got off, she had a very stressed looking face. I smiled as big as I could and said "Molly, I heard the good news. You got your period and are a woman now!" (All you women out there know that was totally for show!) She looked right at me and gave me a huge, tight hug. What was SO shocking about this reaction is that she NEVER gives tight hugs. She leans in but doesn't wrap her arms unless prompted. And even if she does that, she never squeezes. My girl must have felt REALLY relieved to react that way. She wasn't dying! I wonder what she WAS thinking? I was touched by emotion to feel her grasp me that way.
You all know she's a cleaner so she rifles through a gazillion pads. Hard to explain to her that you really don't need to change them every hour but heck...that's better than NOT changing them at all, so she has done remarkably well managing her period through the years.
I keep track on a calendar so that I know her crazy, moody day could be that Flo arrives tomorrow. Or having it marked makes me buy more pads in preparation for the big day. But this post isn't really about that. This post is leading up to the story that she probably wouldn't want me to share. So don't tell her.
Here it goes....
You know that my brain is a bit foggy on years and smaller details so I think this happened the summer before 8th grade. I can't recall why we had to go to the pool that day, as typically, we just don't go those 4-5 days during her period since she doesn't know how to use a tampon. But for whatever reason, we were going to the pool during her period. So she had to wear a tampon.
The first time I used one, I waddled around all day with the cardboard applicator still inserted and could NOT understand why ladies wore these incredibly uncomfortable tampons :) Go ahead, laugh. But I bet YOU have a story too. We all do!
Due to my (uncomfortable) experience, I wanted Molly to be fully prepared. I checked out a gigantic doll from Memorial Hospital that has all the anatomically correct holes. I demonstrated on the doll where a tampon went. Molly didn't seem to be at all interested nor did she seem to understand. So I took it a step further. I invited her into the bathroom with me to demonstrate putting a tampon into myself. She's a visual learner, y'all! Can I just say that that might have been the most embarrassing moment of my life? She had the most horrified look on her face as she watched what I was doing. Almost like "MOM!! WTF are you DOING?!!" I thought "What AM I doing? This is mortifying." So we both quickly moved on and haven't talked about it since. :)
But as you know there was one last step to Molly going to the pool on the day of her period. We had to get a tampon in her! And let me tell you friends, that is not an easy task to do on someone else. The angles are funky. Do I try by standing in front of her...or from behind her? There is a little moisture finagling that has to be done. There is the autism factor where she can't communicate if this is hurting or she's just mortifed. All in all, it's just not a natural mother/daughter situation. And after a few tampon tries, we were successful!! Yippee!! Off to the pool!
She swam. I watched. We stayed for a few hours (for a birthday party? For something Jack was doing? I have no idea?)
When we got home, I said "You did awesome!! Congratulations! Come on into the bathroom and we can take out the tampon." We took off her bathing suit. She stood over the toilet. I went to grab the string to remove the tampon.......and there was NO TAMPON!
I'm sorry pool staff. Do they shut down pools for rogue floating tampons?
We didn't go back to the pool for weeks ;)
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